yellow- where do i want to live when i get older? honestly i wouldn’t mind raising in long island. i think it’s a nice place to grow up. if not here, then i would maybe say somewhere in cali. i really wanna go to the west coast
tan- where do i wanna be right now? right now i am where i want to be: in bed haha
lilac (wth is lilac?)- my dream vacation? if the food is good, then the vacation is good lol but i would like to visit the west coast or watch a game in every major league baseball stadium.
beige- my favorite dream? i don’t really remember any of my dreams. some of my better dreams just involve me being successful in some way haha
white- first kiss? my ex gf
purple- last kiss? my ex gf haha
tangerine- describe someone i like i don’t like anyone right now, so i guess that means my ideal gf? my ideal gf would push me to do things that i normally would be scared to do. she would help me and encourage me and support me.
gray- another relationship story? jeez i skipped class and wrote a paper on the train on my way to surprise my ex gf in pittsburgh for her birthday
green- fam story in the beginning on sophomore year i had a meltdown and my parents drove down from home to pick me up in philly to make sure i was okay. it was the first time in a while that i felt my parents actually cared about me.
gold- story that makes me smile second semester during finals week, all the sophomore girls at the church i go to at school took the time to plan a “brothers appreciation night” where we played a bunch of games and really got to know one another. it meant a lot to have people reach out to me especially in a busy time like finals.
black- something i did embarrassingly senior year of high school, i got really drunk. disappeared in a bathroom for like 20 min, came out with my shirt tucked in my boxers with my pants unbuttoned, talking like a zombie. my friend had to carry me to the train station and then my sister’s friend had to carry me home. i don’t really remember anything else that happened that night haha.
blue- am i still friends with people i met in elementary school? not really? only a few.
magenta- something i barely tell anyone i barely tell people how i feel about them whether it’s good or bad. it’s a habit i’m trying to fix.
red- hobbies eating, sleeping, and sports!
violet- college? i’m already at villanova
brown- relationships vs. friends with benefits i would take being in a relationship over having a fwb any day. i enjoyed the one relationship i was in. it was great having someone there for you all the time. someone to talk to, someone for you to be vulnerable with, someone that really cares for you. i’m not the type of person where i can just hook up with someone and not become attached emotionally. i don’t just want to hook up with a girl and have that be the end of things. i’m going to want to take care of her and talk to her all the time and all that other stuff fwb normally don’t do.
peach- favorite teacher high school psych teacher. he was the man
pink- meaning behind my url "derklee" is a nickname i guess haha. it’s supposed to be my name. in high school a couple of my friends decided to give me the nickname "dur" and that evolved to "durk" and "derk" is just a different way to spell it i guess
Another relationship story:
My ex gf (same one from the story before) and I had a thing with baked goods. For our first anniversary she baked me a pineapple cake in the shape of a pineapple (bc I like pineapples) and walked to my house with the cake. Then to ask her to prom, I ran home during one of my off periods, baked her cupcakes (bc she really liked cupcakes) and wrote “PROM?” on them and then gave them to her at the end of the day. She said yes haha.
i don’t mean what if i moved. i don’t mean i wish i were dead, but sometimes i wish i could disappear for a while and just hover around and watch how the rest of the world carried on. i wonder who would miss me. i wonder what people would say about me. i wonder how i would be remembered.
i once forgot my ex gf’s birthday twice in 4 hours. the worst part was i mixed it up with our friends birthday both times haha
gold: story that makes me smile
during first semester of my sophomore year i was slumping hardcore and i was really depressed. my friends surprised me at midnight for my birthday, baked me a cake and caked me really bad. i was so happy and surprised with the people who were there to surprise me i wanted to cry, but i didn’t
magenta: something i barely tell anyone
i barely tell anyone when i’m annoyed. i try my best to be easygoing and not let things get to me
If there’s one thing I learned in life, it’s that time doesn’t heal anything. Time only makes anger and bitterness grow in your heart. But the most dangerous part about that is, because you become so numb to the pain, you don’t even realize how much it’s affecting you and you accept that it’s…